Feeling Lost

I was feeling lost this week. I felt as if everything was going wrong, and I was trying to do things that were too difficult for me. Plus the dog was being worse than usual, the cockerel was pecking everyone, and my favourite plant was dying—so all the things that are supposed to be fun, supposed to balance the rubbish bits of life, were adding more stress. It was a dark moment, emerging from a difficult week and being over-tired. It happens.

But then, as I was preparing to go to bed, I read Isaiah 42. I am trying to learn it (just 3 words, every day, but it gradually goes in) and I had reached verse 6, and the part that says: אַחְזֵק בְּיָדֶךָ וְאֶצָּרְךָ I will seize your hand and guard you. The direct translation is better than most English Bibles, as the verb for ‘holding/taking your hand’ is much stronger than just ‘holding’ or ‘taking’. It’s more of a ‘strong grab.’ Which, when you are feeling tired and defeated, is extremely comforting, don’t you think? I was, at that moment, feeling like a failure, but God (who never fails) was grabbing hold of my hand and would guard me. Like a parent grabs hold of their child to stop them falling or walking into danger.

I realise that I am taking the text out of context, and the original author was not intending it to be about me—but I think that’s the thing with the Bible—sometimes it speaks straight into your situation, and you realise it is changing you. For me, this is why I am a Christian. It’s not so much about religion or theology, as about God being there—being part of the excellent bits of life, and the really rubbish bits. Frankly, I don’t think I could do it on my own, not really. I’m not very strong or clever or talented—I’m just a normal person who makes lots of mistakes. Like most of us. But I have a God who will seize hold of my hand when necessary, and that is very comforting.

I hope you find the help you need this week too. Thank you for reading.
Take care.
Love, Anne x