Hello, and how are you? This post nearly didn’t get written–it has been a hectic week. Please forgive any typos, I am writing in a rush before Monday has gone, and my regular Monday blog doesn’t appear (for the first time since 2015, I believe). Usually I am very organised, and if I’m going away or have a busy time ahead, I post things in advance. But not this time. This time I was much too busy preparing for my First Year Review.

For those who don’t know, I’m currently doing my PhD research, part time, at Edinburgh Uni. Every year, I have a review, to check I’m on track and to prepare me for the final Viva (a spoken examination). However, before you are considered a fully-fledged PhD researcher, you have to pass the First Year Review (which for me, as a part-timer, is after 2 years of study). This is a big deal. I have loved researching, and am learning lots of fascinating things. But if you don’t pass the review, the university recommends that you leave. I was very keen to not be thrown out, but I also was far from confident that I could pass. Most of my interactions with other students reinforces my feeling that actually, everyone else is much more clever than me, with a much deeper knowledge base. I feel very new to all this (even though I am older than most of the staff). I was very anxious about it.

The review begins weeks in advance, when I submit a writing sample and an updated proposal. (A proposal is the document which explains what you plan to research, and how you plan to do it.) I wrote a proposal as part of my initial application to the university, but they often change once the research begins (mine has changed almost entirely). There was also a long form to complete, showing what I have done in the last year, what skills I have developed. It all took a long time to complete, and edit, and rewrite. It was a lovely feeling when it was all submitted.

I then began to prepare for the review. My supervisor suggested some aspects of my research which might receive questions, so I read around these areas, trying to formulate arguments to justify my approach. (A supervisor is a member of staff who works alongside you, giving feedback and making helpful suggestions–it’s usual to meet with them every few months.) I knew I would need to justify how my research will be used when it’s complete, and why I have chosen to work with the ‘final’ Hebrew texts (because many scholars consider the ‘most original’ text is the best, and the ‘final form’ was written fairly late — and actually ‘final form’ means different things to different people, so there is not really a single ‘final’ form). I also found work written by the people who would be assessing me, so I could understand their own positions on things.

The day arrived. I was terrified. I wore a trouser suit (hoped to look like I had tried). Unfortunately I have gained weight since I last wore it, so it was uncomfortable and I bulged in the wrong places. I walked to the university, allowing plenty of time to find the room, go to the washroom, comb my hair (which was lucky, because the room changed, and New College is beautiful but like a rabbit warren). I was allocated to a tower room. I walked past lots of tourists taking photos (later they will wonder who the woman in their photos with unfortunate bulges was). I stood outside a large door (like a church door) wondering whether to wait or knock. I waited until exactly 10 am, knocked. A voice called me in. It began.

Mostly it was okay, but difficult. The room was hot, so I removed my jacket. A panel of 3 people asked various questions. Nothing was unexpected; I was glad I had done my homework. It wasn’t a smiley interview, but neither was it too horrible, and once I began talking I forgot about being anxious and submerged into the excitement of what I am studying. I love talking about all the amazing things I am discovering, and I had 3 people trapped for an hour, who could not escape while I bubbled enthusiastically about what I am doing. (They looked a lot less bored than most people who I try to tell! Although they did interrupt a few times to ask questions; especially when I got a bit distracted and started to tell them about something which is really interesting but not connected to what they were asking about.)

Then it was done. I left. Felt exhausted.

The university send the result within 24 hours, which is nice. I had passed. Marvellous. I could now enjoy the rest of the week with my cohorts, chatting, sharing papers, attending seminars. It was a good week, but completely exhausting. On Friday I gave a paper. (This means you have a strict time slot to read a document about an aspect of your research to a room of scholars, who then ask lots of questions.) I have never presented a paper before, but I found the process very helpful–it made me write differently. I also made a Power-point of visuals, and used AI to produce a couple of pictures, which was great fun (and much easier than expected).

I am now home. I plan to have a week of nothing, reading novels and watching Netflix and walking the dog. Next week I shall start work again. I love studying, and it’s lovely to know that I now have 4 years to complete my work. I will have annual reviews, but they are more for me, to prepare me for the Viva–the university won’t throw me out now. I am officially a research student, albeit an old one. Great fun.

I hope you have some fun too this week. Thank you for reading.
Take care.
Love, Anne x