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Swigging Wine in the Supermarket Carpark….

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When you have a family, even when in theory they have grown up and moved away, there are always unexpected laughs and worries.

One big worry for me recently has been one ‘child’s’ health. I was more worried than him I think, and had a few sleepless nights, before his endoscopy showed he didn’t have cancer or Crohn’s disease. I knew in my head that the odds were good, but mummies worry. It’s what we do. He was very relaxed about the whole thing, was sure they’d find nothing major wrong (which was correct) and even, during the procedure, made them laugh by asking if they could “keep a look out for my car keys while you’re there, because I’ve lost those somewhere.”

The hospital sent him home with a written report, which even included photographs. Why would anyone want photos of their insides? Son assured me it was the male equivalent of baby scan printouts. He said he was trying to decide whether to put them on Facebook to show all his friends, or cut them out to put in a card for his girlfriend. I do hope he was joking.

This worry did not however, lead to swigging wine in the supermarket carpark – whatever you might hear to the contrary. That was something else. We are preparing for the launch of JOANNA, and need some decent wine that doesn’t cost a fortune. So we bought a couple of bottles which were on ‘special offer’ and tasted them with some friends, to check they were okay. They were, so the following day we went back to the supermarket to buy enough for the launch. Except they had sold out. Hence we realised that wine on ‘special offer’ sells out quickly, so we needed to buy it when we saw it. But I was keen to taste it first (so we didn’t serve awful wine to our guests). So, we bought a bottle of each, took them into the carpark, and had a quick taste…It was embarrassing. I don’t really have a self-image of me and my husband swigging wine from bottles in supermarket carparks. But we were. And a few people noticed (but didn’t comment, which made it worse). Son found it hilarious.

One of the nice things about the health scare, was it meant we had Colon-Boy at home for the week. (If you read that name, it means he hasn’t yet! Sometimes I write things which I know my family will tell me to remove when they read it. When you get to my age, you get your laughs where you can, and I see it as ‘pay-back’ for all those two year old tantrums in supermarkets I had to endure when I was young and stressed….) Having a son at home does entail a certain amount of male competitiveness, especially with food. I will ask, “How many cheese and leek pastries will you eat?” First male will ask for two (even though he never eats more than one), second male will then ask for three. I cook them, even though I know both males will be trying to smuggle pastry into the bin without me seeing. Sometimes I pretend I don’t have enough, just to save them. Other times I cook what was requested and then stay at the table while they try to force themselves to finish. Like I said, it’s kind of payback. (If you have young children, hold on to these thoughts – your time will come…..)

The chickens are still shut inside. They’re very unhappy, and keen for the bird flu epidemic to finish (not that it is anywhere near our county), so they can be released back into the garden. I am also unhappy, as I have to clean them out at least once a day. I’m also slightly worried what will happen when I do release them. Cockerels have a tendency to fight over new territory, and when I release them, they will have forgotten they’ve already been in the garden, decide it’s new territory and fight over who is boss. Cockerels will fight to the death. So I’m not really sure how to release them safely. I currently have three cockerels – two are full grown, one is the November hatchling. I may not have three next time I write…..Will do some internet research and try to find a way to release them without starting a war.

The ducks are less unhappy. They are classed as ‘released birds’ (like game birds which have been released) so although I’m feeding them under cover, they’re still on the pond. Which is fenced. Except I keep finding them on the lawn, because they’re very good at escaping. When they see me and Kia, they know they’ve been naughty, so they instantly start to run (even though they can all fly) round to the gate, and back onto the pond. They’re like naughty children!

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If you would like be one of the first to buy a copy of JOANNA (and drink some ‘not too bad’ wine) then perhaps you would like to come to the book launch. It will be on 29th March, in Kent, UK. If you’d like an invite, fill out the contact form below:

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Thank you for your response. ✨

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Thank you for reading.

You can’t always trust what you read…….which is scary.

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Several months ago, a friend recommended a book: Jesus Through Middle Eastern Eyes by Kenneth Bailey. It sounded interesting, so I bought it, read it, loved it (many thanks Rev Hatfield). I have since devoured all Kenneth E Bailey’s other books, and was disappointed to learn he has died recently, so won’t be writing any more.

The books are interesting because Mr Bailey is a clever man. He has a knowledge of both middle Eastern culture, and also the languages the Bible was written in. He takes a passage, one that anyone who reads the Bible knows well, and puts in into context. He shows how people of Bible times would have responded to the things said and done, what the language is likely to mean, why things have been translated as they have.

So, take for example, the story of the Samaritan woman at the well, who Jesus asks for a drink. I already knew that Jews and Samaritans were enemies, and that a man speaking to an unknown woman was unusual, but the book explains so much more. It points out the flirtatious nature of the woman’s initial words to Jesus, how she was assuming he wanted something more than water! It also shows how she tried to misdirect the conversation, to move it away from a personal discussion about her own faith. All very interesting.

My Bailey also spends a lot of time showing how words have been translated. He very often challenges why particular words have been used in the English translation, why passages have been broken up into certain chapters. He points out that sometimes whole meanings have changed because the end of one chapter has been placed at the beginning of the next one, which makes the reader assume it is part of something else. I’m not sure if I’m explaining this properly – but unless I copy vast chunks of his text (which will make this very long) I need to just give you an overview. Really, you need to read some of his books for yourself.

Now, the thing that has caused me a problem, is when Kenneth Bailey looks at particular translations. Why Luke would have used a certain word, and whether the translation is reliable. It is fascinating, especially if you speak another language, so have a feel for how direct translations are rarely possible between languages with different roots. (If you are someone who believes you can put a phrase into the Biblical language equivalent of ‘Google Translate’ and come up with a phrase you can trust, this article is not aimed at you!) However, it has left me with a slight insecurity. The whole church practice of taking a text – one verse that explains an ethos – seems very flawed when you realise how unreliable our translations are. How much can we trust what we read in the Bible?

There is great danger in thinking along these lines. Although the Bible never claims to be infallible – Christians do NOT claim that it was dictated word for word (which some other religions claim about their holy books) – it is what we rely on to learn about God. The Bible claims to be the word of God, to point the way to God, to explain something of the character of God. It should not therefore be dismissed as unreliable. Except, our translations ARE unreliable. As you read what Bailey writes, you realise that to take individual verses literally is actually a bit dodgy. It can give a very skewed idea about what Jesus taught, about how we should view God, about how the church should be functioning.

What then is the solution? I do believe the Bible is an important way that God teaches us. I do believe we can learn the character of God within the pages of the Bible, that it guides and shapes us. I am just not sure any more that we should take snippets and be confident that “This says such and such, therefore, we must behave in this way.” I’m sure there are people who will label me as ‘liberal’, who will dismiss what I am saying as ‘diluted Christianity’. But actually, I am simply one person who is trying to discover who God is. I now believe, that to take individual verses as ‘proof’ of something is dangerous. We might be heading off in the wrong direction. I believe that the only reliable way to use the Bible is to read LOTS of it. To look at individual passages in the light of all the others. That the whole Bible will give us a taste of the essence of God, and that will lead us into the right choices. But to base any action on a single verse is foolish. We should not be ignoring certain parts of the Bible, even the difficult boring bits, they were put there for a reason. They all work together to give us an overview, an understanding, of God.

Take for example the story of Jesus allowing the children to approach him, when he took them onto his knee and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.”
I have heard many sermons use this as a text. We are urged to come to God trustingly, openly, simply. Which might be right. But do read what else has been written guys, don’t just take that snippet. Children have lots of attributes: They are very selfish. They don’t plan ahead (“I need the toilet NOW”). They will eat sweets until they are sick. They believe in everything that looks true, including monsters and talking teddies. Are we meant to approach God like this? With no forward planning? No questioning? No regard for others beyond our own immediate comfort? I don’t think so. To know what was meant, you need an understanding of the whole.

Or look at the passage where women are told to “not speak” during church services because it is “shameful”. Yet according to scholars, “speak” is better translated as “chatter” and the “shame” is like, “a shame if I don’t do that”, a sort of “not quite proper” rather than a strong condemnation. Yet many English churches have used this passage to stop women preaching, ignoring the places where Paul refers to women prophets and female leaders in the early church.

When I discussed this at home, it was pointed out that some people like to keep things simple. They like to take things at face value, they would feel I was over complicating things. The trouble is, it is because people have taken things at face value, have used snippets of the Bible to set their direction, that Christians have done some terrible things. Wars, murder, oppression, all done with the backing of a few verses from the Bible, all justified as “God’s Will” because of things written in the Bible. If we study the whole Bible, learn the character of God, and use that as our guide, then I feel this is much more reliable. We are working with a translation people, written thousands of years ago and transcribed millions of times. YES it points the way to God. NO, each and every word cannot and should not, be relied upon. The whole “God won’t let us misinterpret his will” argument is rubbish too – try living in Henry VIII times. Which is a bit scary because it means that to understand God requires effort. To live as God intends us to live, whatever our age, means we have to work hard. We cannot simply clutch at a few random verses and announce we’ve “got it”.

Knowing God takes time. Perhaps a whole life time. Perhaps that is the point.

xxx

Thank you for reading.

anneethompson.com

xxx

Publishing Update

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Hello, here’s what has been happening in the world of books. Hopefully these snippets of information will be useful/interesting. This whole writing/publishing venture is like a journey across a new country! There is lots to discover.

Hidden Faces is still selling, though as expected, sales have slowed down. I have sold about 60% of the books now (in 6 months, so I am meeting my sales targets). Most sales have been either to friends buying them from Amazon, or by direct sales – me attending fairs and bookclubs and speaking to various groups. Talking to other new authors, this seems to be normal.

Although I sell through Amazon, they do take nearly all of the profit (which means if I am to break even, I must sell every last copy). Shops that buy through a wholesaler (Waterstones and Foyles) take even more. I therefore decided I would sell my books through my own website. I can absorb the cost of UK posting (as it roughly equates what Amazon’s cut is) and I can also now sell internationally.

Initially, I was going to include my email details on my blog, so people could email their address and I could reply with payment details. However, a quick look online suggested this would mainly fill my inbox with spam, and I was better off making a ‘contact form’ on a post for people to use. I can’t process credit/debit cards, so I will have to ask people to pay by bank transfer or cheque. I also think most people might feel worried about never receiving the books, so I will ask for payment after they have received their copies. Of course, some dishonest people might then never pay. Or people might feel uncomfortable doing business with someone they don’t know. I will let you know what happens. If I have too many people who don’t pay, I will have to stop selling them privately. My new book, JOANNA, is due to be released at the end of March, so I have set up a preordering form too.

On the copyright page, it is usual to state that a copy of the book has been lodged with the British Library. I looked into this. Apparently, anything that is published in England, is legally supposed to be sent to the British Library. It’s an old law, and means that throughout history people can see the sorts of things that are published. It applies to all published material, whether or not it has an ISBN number (so I assume it also applies to things like school magazines – though I’m not entirely sure.) It certainly applies to books. If you publish a book, you are obliged to send the library a copy. The address is:

Legal Deposit Office
The British Library
Boston Spa
Wetherby
West Yorkshire
LS23 7BY

They are working on some kind of computer program, so in the near future we will be able to send a digital copy. But for now, you must send a paper copy.

There are a few other libraries (one is in Scotland, one is part of Cambridge University) which also have the legal right to request copies of your book, and you are obliged to send them one. However you only have to send them one if they actually request a copy.

As I said, JOANNA is now ready. We added the ISBN number and cover photo on the Nielsen’s website. This means it is listed as ‘published’ now, even though I don’t intend to sell any copies until the end of March. It also appears automatically on Amazon, Waterstones and Foyles online shops. (Note, this does not happen if you publish via Amazon Self-Publishing. This is because other shops view Amazon as a competitor, so will not stock their books. I’m not sure about other self-publishing services.) But I doubt anyone will order from there until I advertise it, (plus it costs them more) so I am hoping to preserve the launch date.

We now have to decide whether or not to also publish it as a Kindle book. Although I find it harder to sell Kindle copies ( you need to spend a lot of time networking on social media to build relationships with people who you don’t know, and I don’t really have time). However, some people tell me they only read ebooks. A few have still bought copies, but I realise they would prefer to read it on Kindle. But most Kindle books are cheaper, and I need to recoup my editing/typesetting/cover photograph costs. Will people be willing to pay as much for a Kindle copy as for a paperback, or will they see the Kindle book as ‘free’ to produce, and therefore think I am being greedy (rather than understanding that actually, it did cost me almost as much, as the printing costs are a tiny proportion of overall costs.) Difficult to know. Do let me know if you have an opinion, it will help me to decide.

Talking of Amazon, I was a bit shocked to see there are now three other sellers listed as selling Hidden Faces. They are selling secondhand copies for a cheaper price, which they keep reducing, so they appear before The Cobweb Press. This was unexpected. I have no idea if they actually have copies (they claim they are in stock). It’s a pain, because friends who look on Amazon for my book might not notice, and click the first seller that appears (rather than looking at ‘buyer options’ and looking for a ‘new’ copy). I don’t think there’s a way to avoid this, anyone can set up as a seller on Amazon. They cannot have new copies (because I own them all). I am suspicious they may have come from wholesalers. When you apply to a wholesaler, to ask them for a trading agreement (which you have to do if you want to sell through big shops) they ask you to send them a copy of the book. I guess they receive hundreds of books each week. They’re not going to bother to store those books, so I’m wondering if they sell them on to dealers. Or perhaps even have their own secondhand bookshop. I don’t know. I do wish though that I had written ‘Sample, not for resale’ somewhere in the book. It’s another reason for encouraging people to buy directly from me, as potentially I am losing money. Yet again, the big companies are making it almost impossible for the new indie publisher.

Of course, the main hindrance to managing to cover my costs is the number of people who lend books! You wouldn’t believe how many people bubble to me how much they have enjoyed Hidden Faces, they can’t wait to read the next one, it was really gripping and they have now lent it to their sister/neighbour/friend. Aaagh. I wish they had told other people about it and got me a few more sales, or written a review. But what can you do?

xxx

Thank you for reading. This is the link to preorder JOANNA:

Joanna

xxxxx

Picasso

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Letter to a Daughter

Dear Bee,

How are you? I hope work is fun but you’re getting home at a decent time. So awful at the moment with no sun and dingy mornings, I am ready for Spring to arrive.

I thought about you yesterday. Partly because I was in London (I waved from the train when we passed near your flat. Got strange looks from everyone else in the carriage and the man sitting next to me moved to another seat.) The other reason was because I was going to a Picasso exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery. It reminded me of when I used to take you there when you were little.

We had a lecture first. There was a lot of information (too much to remember actually, but it wasn’t too warm, so I stayed awake.) The lecturer was very good, she obviously knew her stuff, and explained it nice and simply. I think Picasso can be summed up in three words: seedy, witty, clever. But I’ll give you a quick over view of his life, it might be useful if ever you have to look knowledgeable.

img_5544He was born in Malaga (I’m sure you remember this, from our holiday there when you were about 4 years old…) His father was an artist (painted mainly birds it seems – pigeons and doves – very realistically.) Picasso started to copy his father, and when he was just twelve he finished one of his Dad’s paintings and was told it was better than his father’s. We saw a self-portrait he did when he was 13 (to be honest, he did a LOT of self-portraits. Says something about the man, I think.) He was at an art college in Barcelona, and his work was pretty good actually. None of the weird stuff that appeared later.

When he was older, he lived in Paris, and was there during the war (when he used lots of dingy colours and contorted faces to show the unrest/cruelty of the times.) He tried out lots of different styles, copying other artists. There was a bit of cubism (painting weird geometric shapes across the canvas), things like that. He doodled a lot, and drew caricatures of his friends and family. He always refused to take commissions for ‘classical’ portraits, when the model is flattered and surrounded by lots of emblems to show their status. He wanted to paint their personality, their mood. Many of his portraits, even though the subject sat for many hours when posing, are barely even recognisable as human. (I expect some of them were rather cross.) However, lots of his work was given to friends, rather than for exhibition. These pieces tended to be smaller, and more realistic. I preferred them.

I was interested by his realistic portraits. He was undoubtedly talented. I don’t really like his later stuff at all – all those eyes at weird angles and mouths and noses not in sync. However, one thing was interesting. We were shown a cubist painting (which just looked a mess of shapes with a random eye plonked to one side) and were told to ‘fuzz’ our eyes. I took off my glasses (fuzzes the whole world!) and the portrait looked completely different – you could see the man, how he was sitting, holding his hands in front of him. That was clever.

I also went to the gift shop, while waiting for the people who I was having lunch with (who were all rather more interested in the paintings than I was). I managed to avoid the £800 etchings and £52 tray, and even the rather natty ‘Picasso’ tee-shirt and beret set. I was tempted by one of the books though. It was a children’s book, and I wished you were young again, so I could buy it for you. It was written about a little boy’s experiences, when Picasso visited him in England. It showed a glimpse of the man, the child-like, creative, story-telling old man, who was happy to make curiosities for a little boy. There was also a painting of the boy’s mother – all skew-wiffy, with nose and mouth and eyes in different directions. But when you compared it to a photograph of the mother, and drew a line around her profile, what Picasso had painted has exactly the same edge. Which is also clever.

But you’re not little any more, so I didn’t buy you a copy. I bought some postcards instead.
Better go. Try and pop down when you get time. Eat properly.

Lots of Love,
Mum xx

img_5545 Portrait of his first wife, Olga (he had a lots of women, but only married two of them.) This one won a prize in the US (where Picasso never visited, but a friend entered it for him.) I like this painting (it’s less fuzzy in real life). She does look fed up in all of them though, so I think being painted must be boring. She was a Russian ballet dancer, so probs didn’t much like having to keep still for long periods of time.

Instow: The Beach for Dog Lovers…

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We came for a mini break to Instow, near Bideford in Devon. It is, by far, the most dog friendly place I have ever visited. In fact, if you don’t like dogs, you will find this a difficult village to visit. We loved it.

We hired a cottage (through English Country Cottages) right next to the beach. We looked out, across the estuary, watching as the tide filled the bay and floated the boats, then went out again, leaving them stranded. When the tide was out, the expanse of hard sand was immense. Every dog owner in the world seemed to arrive – I never saw less than 20 dogs on the beach at any time. There were the early morning walkers (who tended to have annoying yappy little dogs) and the midday walkers with children. There were even ‘after dark’ walkers (they tended to have the big dogs).

Husband had brought his gym kit and persuaded me to bring mine. So we could go for runs along the beach. He has recently watched ‘Chariots of Fire’. I fear his image of young men training for the Olympics by running through sea spray was not going to match the reality of a couple over 50 staggering along, trying to avoid tripping on the dog lead. We never went.

Across the bay was Appledore, a pretty Devon village with cottages scattered up a hill. It looked like Toytown from our cottage. Bizarrely, although we could walk to fairly near it when the tide was out, the river was always too big to cross, so without a boat it was unreachable (unless you drove for miles to a bridge, I suppose).

Even the pubs and restaurants were dog-friendly. They also all displayed 5* hygiene ratings (when you feed the public, you start to take note of these things and avoid places with a low star rating.) We ate in a variety of pubs, all within Instow, all very friendly and with excellent menus. If you go in the summer, you probably need to book. We could even take the dog into the cafe on the front, as long as she sat quietly under the table.

Instow has quite a big military presence (as I discovered, if you read yesterday’s blog!) This is due to the US and British military using the Devon coastline to practice for the D-Day landings.

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A Walk on the Wild Side…

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img_0963So, Husband announces he wants to walk ‘somewhere prettier’. We’re on a mini-break in Devon, staying in a cottage practically on the beach, but we haven’t actually seen much of the ‘typical’ North Devon scenery. You know, the rolling hills with tiny fields and lots of green.

I thought our village was pretty perfect, but I try to be accommodating, so I said he could choose. This was a mistake.

Firstly, he scurries off with the map and plans a walk which, for some unknown reason, needs to be a secret. I am to have no input at all as to where we go. At this stage, I thought this was fine, a nice surprise, no danger involved or anything like that.

Then we pack the dog and boots into the car, and off we go, heading towards Barnstaple. After a while, we left the main roads and drove along ever narrowing lanes. When the satnav stopped naming them, and then stopped showing them at all (so it looked as if the car was heading through space) I should have been warned. But I wasn’t (I am very easy-going, cheerfully gullible, things like that.)

We arrived at a carpark. The bridleways beyond were fenced, with gates and styles for access. There were, I will admit, a couple of signs, warning the military used the area. But there were no “Keep Out” signs, no locks on the gates, no signs that said “Danger”. None that I saw anyway. So on we marched.

We quickly came to undulating sand dunes, grassy areas, and marshy ponds. It was rather lovely. We headed off, towards where we thought the coast was.img_0965

It was then that I spotted some runners, way off in the distance. They were all wearing white tee-shirts, and I thought perhaps these were the army training exercises. Nice place to run, next to the sea. As I watched them, I realised there was another group, slightly nearer to us, wearing camouflage gear. And firing guns. This felt less safe.

Husband assured me they were probably ‘outward-bound types’ or shooting blanks, and we were fine, we just needed to avoid walking in front of where they were aiming. I sort of believed him. After all, the military wouldn’t shoot in an area used by dog walkers, would they?

A little later, as we skirted the men firing guns, to climb other dunes in our quest to find the sea, we saw some military vehicles. They had their headlights on, and were coming towards us at speed. I wondered if we were going to be arrested. But they zoomed off in another direction before they reached us.

Then we heard machine guns firing. At this point, I got stroppy. I told Husband I was very unhappy and felt uncomfortable about being fired at, and I wanted to go back to the car. He agreed. Trouble was, we were lost.

We had made so many detours, it was hard to remember even which direction we had come from. The area was huge, in different circumstances (ie, not being fired at) it would’ve been lovely. After wandering for a while, Husband looked at phone to see if it had a map. It did. It also showed our position, and where we had parked the car (clever phone).

We made it back to the car, neither shot nor arrested. We did see a few signs that we missed on the way in though….

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xxxxxxx

Thank you for reading.

Tomorrow I’ll tell you about the rest of our holiday (nothing quite as exciting. Thankfully.)

xxxxx

anneethompson.com

Family Life and stuff

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We went to see daughter’s new flat. We filled the car with her stuff (actually, we could’ve filled many cars with her stuff, but we were only allowed to take permitted items. She’s a bit scary) and drove into London (well, the edge of London.) Her flat is very nice – Victorian with lovely high ceilings and a bay window. Though husband was somewhat perturbed because amongst the many photos of friends and family, he could not find one of himself. And daughter was somewhat perturbed as the boys arrived with a HUGE photo for her wall of…….themselves.

We then went out for coffee. Boys commented that they could tell they were in London by both the prices and because the first items on the menu contained, “avocado, quinoa, and bee pollen” (what the heck is ‘bee pollen‘????). They are Northerners at heart. They told me the cafe was “Very Shoreditch”. (In case you don’t know, ‘Shoreditch’ is the word that now replaces ‘hipster’, which is the word that replaced ‘trendy’, which is the word that replaced ‘hip’. Apparently. Keeping up? Me neither.)

They’re funny though. I photographed their cocktail menu, for when we have parties. Thought it might make you smile:

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A few years ago they built a bar in our garage (they told me it was temporary. It’s been there about 5 years now.) When we have parties, if they’re home, they man the bar. They’re rather good at it. Despite drinking way more alcohol than I approve of, they’re also quite responsible. At our latest party I spotted them filling a vodka bottle with water – they told me it was to add ‘shots’ to drinks for our friends when they were drunk enough…..Hmmmm.

xxxxxx

Thank you for reading.

anneethompson.com

xxxxx

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

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So, have you watched ‘Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them’? As part of the whole, ‘family at home for Christmas so we ought to do something’ time, we went to the cinema. Afterwards we had dinner at Pizza Hut (even though I promised myself about ten years ago, that I would never have to eat in a Pizza Hut again.) It was actually a really fun evening. I’ll tell you about it (with a warning if you haven’t seen the film, this does contain spoilers.)

For those of you who don’t know (mainly you, Mum) ‘Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them’ is another film in the Harry Potter series – you know, the ones about the boy who is a wizard, who makes friends with the ginger-haired boy, and the girl who all the teenagers now fancy? Well, this film is supposed to be before all that took place, in the 1920’s, and is set in New York. I came away with very mixed feelings about it.

Firstly, it is excellent entertainment. I usually get bored in films aimed at a younger audience (the Harry Potter books and films didn’t quite do it for me if I’m honest.) This film however, I watched throughout without ever wondering how much longer before it ended. The plot was good enough, but the acting was excellent (perhaps J.K. Rowling decided experienced adult actors would make a better film and so wrote a book with only grown-ups in it. Or perhaps I am too cynical.) The special effects and scenery were all convincing, making for something of a visual treat. If you like a bit of make-believe, I expect you will love this film.

However, and this is quite a big however, there was something that left me feeling uneasy. It didn’t feel the same as the Harry Potter films, which I felt never really strayed from storybook witches and wizards. Now, I was not one of those Christians who refused to read her children ‘Hansel and Gretel’ or ‘Sleeping Beauty’ because they contained witches. I do believe there are spiritual forces that are evil, I do believe we shouldn’t mess with that stuff, and occult practices and ‘real’ witchcraft is dangerous. I just do not happen to put the witch in Sleeping Beauty into this category. It is a story, unrelated to real life, and the witches in it are not representations of people involved in the occult. I wasn’t so comfortable with this story. With Harry Potter, I felt the message of ‘good defeating evil’ was very clear. There were witches and magic, but it was all storybook stuff, and the baddies were easy to spot, and it was all far removed from reality.

In Fantastic Beasts we were presented with the New Salem Philanthropic Society. These were humans who were against witchcraft. It all felt a bit too much like things that happened in real life. Even the name is not exactly made up. And yes, I realise that people claiming to be Christian have done some pretty terrible things (in the past and present) and I know the ‘witch hunts’ in Salem were very bad. But why bring reality, even a touch of it, into a fantasy film? What is the point being made?

There was also an execution scene. It was, I felt, not really in keeping with a children’s film. Although what actually happened wasn’t gory or gruesome, the thought of someone walking towards a death sentence is not one I would want my 12 year old thinking about.

Not that I was with 12 year olds of course. I was with my family, who enjoyed the film. Their only comment was that when the characters gave instructions to their wands, it always worked, and when they do the same with their phone: “Hello Google, what is the time?” the phone always gets it wrong: “Certainly. Phoning Grandma.”

After the film, we went next door to Pizza Hut. We used to go to Pizza Hut a lot as students. We had no money, and it was a cheap place for a ‘special meal’ when we wanted to go out. I have moved on from those times. Husband hasn’t. He went excitedly to the salad bar, to show his sons how to extend the perimeter of the salad bowl with slices of cucumber, thus enabling extra salad to be heaped into the bowl. Sons were unimpressed and pointed out that unlike in the ‘olden days’, you could visit the salad bar as many times as you wanted. I actually, was unkeen on eating any salad at all, as on our way in we had passed a small child who appeared to be massaging the lettuce.

Actually, it wasn’t too bad. If you ignored the sticky menu (a variation on a ‘taster menu’) and the sticky seat and the sticky table, everything was fine. The waitress was friendly, the pizzas were nice, and the wine went down very well. The males in the family then made a comparison table of stats showing how the price per size of pizza compared to pizza express – but I don’t think this is an obligatory activity if you choose to go with different people.

Take care,
Anne x

Counting Stars is available from Amazon to read on a tablet or Kindle. A great read, at £1.99, with 5*reviews! Go on, why not treat yourself?…..

 

xxxxxx

Thank you for reading.

xxxxx

anneethompson.com

xxx

2017 has begun…

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img_5539Christmas has been tidied away for another year. So, what do you do with all the cards you received? ‘Regift’ the things you didn’t like? Hide them in a drawer? Force yourself to use them because whoever chose them for you hoped you would enjoy them? Happy to take everything off the Christmas tree and throw it in the garden? Or feel nostalgic as you remember where each bauble came from?

I could of course, say something religious here. I could talk about trying to not ‘pack away’ Jesus for another year. But I think I’ll let you think about that one on your own. I shall focus on cards.

My favourite card this year was from one of my friends who doesn’t speak any English. She’s a really close friend, we meet whenever we have time, and chat about our children and husbands and mother-in-laws. Even though Chinese people don’t really ‘do’ Christmas like we do, she knows it matters to me, and she always buys me a Christmas card. This year, the front of the card said, “Happy Christmas Grandad”. I was momentarily confused, then realised that she must have bought it on her own, when her children (who all speak excellent English) weren’t with her to translate. I love it. It has gone into my bedside cabinet with cards from my husband.

I always keep my cards from my husband. He also keeps mine. This was extremely useful the year when I forgot Valentine’s Day until late the night before. I was able to sneak into his bedside cabinet, pick a card I had sent him a previous year, put it into a fresh envelope, and give it to him with our morning tea, the same as every other year. Yes, I know, terrible. But he didn’t notice (he’d have been hurt if he knew I had forgotten.)

Sometimes cards go wrong of course. My brother taught the kids club at church for years, and when he stopped leading it, he was presented with a giant card during the service. He felt rather touched. Until he opened it, and it was blank! The person asked to buy it had thought someone else was going to write in it, and the person presenting it thought it was finished. (These things happen in churches. It teaches us forgiveness I guess.)

Then there was the year after my Dad died, when Mum received cards from friends saying they were sorry to hear that Dad had died – but the envelope was addressed to “Mr and Mrs”. I guess they went into ‘autopilot’ when writing the address bit. Mum didn’t mind, she thought it was funny.

Actually, Mum kept her sense of humour throughout the horrible trauma of Dad dying. I remember one incident, when he was very poorly (he had cancer, so nothing happened easily.) Mum was always very friendly to the children who lived in the road, and they wanted to cheer her up. So, one night, when they were going to a fancy dress party, they decided to knock on her door first, to show her their costumes. Dad was upstairs, very poorly. Mum heard a knock on the front door, and opened it to find – The Grim Reaper! Luckily, Mum just laughed. (I don’t think the children had really thought about what they were wearing, they just wanted to show her their costumes.)

Hope your year has started well. I recommend you keep a few cards hidden for emergencies.

Take care,
Anne x

Happy New Year!

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Happy New Year! I hope you have enjoyed the whole Christmas period and 2017 is a good one for you. I always think the new year is like an unopened gift, none of us know what it will bring, but it makes us look ahead, to think about things we might like to change or try harder with.

One thing I would like to change is a Christmas gift husband bought for our sons. We had a ‘Men in Black’ party, so he thought it would be a good idea to give them alien guns. It wasn’t. The gun lit up when fired and made a noise. A very loud, irritating noise. Like those toys which people who have never had children buy for your toddlers (and you remove the batteries as soon as they leave.) Except, my sons are not toddlers. They are 20 and 22.

Did you like my story? It was bit of an experiment. Modern European literature has everything in a story build towards the end, where the climax is. However, I have been reading about ancient Greek literature, where the climax, the most important part, is in the middle. It acts like a sort of hinge, with the elements on either side balancing each other. I found this a very interesting idea, so would like to try and write my next book, Clara Oakes, in this style. Not in a way that the reader especially notices, it will read like a normal novel, but just for my own amusement, to see if I can. So “One of those days…” was a practise for me. It was more difficult than I thought, though quite fun to write, bit of a challenge.
If you missed it, the link is:https://anneethompson.com/2016/12/27/one-of-those-days/

We saw a lot of the extended family over the holiday, which was nice. I’m very fortunate, as our family all gets on very well, the cousins enjoy being with each other and we share the same sense of humour. One tradition is a games evening at my sister-in-law’s. Each family takes a game, and we eat bacon sandwiches, and sit around on chairs and the floor, chatting and playing games.

One game was a memory game, which involved lots of changing seats and remembering names that changed every turn. I was completely confused the entire time.

Another game was a word game. We worked in pairs, and were given a word or picture. We then, independently, wrote a prescribed number of other words, which related to what we were given. This list was compared with our partner, and we got points for all those which were the same. So for example, one word was ‘Airport’. I wrote: Heathrow, Gatwick, Newark, JFK, Manchester, Luton, Stansted. My husband wrote all the same, except he wrote ‘City’ instead of Manchester, so we got 6 points.

My brother was with my mother. Trying to guess what my mother thinks is quite a challenge, so he had a very difficult job. For ‘Airport’, Mum wrote: planes, Ruth leaves, Ruth arrives, noise. He didn’t manage to match any of those (can’t think why!) My personal favourite was the word ‘Compass’. Mum wrote: come, pass, useful, Ben Tucker. Again, none of my brother’s words matched, though Mum was able to explain exactly how her choices were completely logical. It was very funny.

Of course, the couple who scored the highest were my sons. I sometimes think they’re the same person shared between two different bodies. Ever since son 2 was born, they have basically been a unit. Even now, when the second son returns home, his brother greets him in the hall and they start talking and they talk, or play computer games, or watch telly, until one of them leaves. They are in ‘boy world’ and the rest of us are outside. Which is nice. Unless they have alien guns. Then they’re just annoying.

Have a lovely 2017.
Take care,
Anne x